5 Easy Steps To Not Let Comparison Steal Your Identity

Growing up I was (still is) a wild child. By wild I mean, outgoing, and open. When i moved to America i had to  learn that there are many things that are considered inappropriate (still learning this) and out of line. For the last 9-10 years, I was learning how to act normal, laugh at the right time, wear the right clothes and say the right things. Basically in any social gathering I would watch the person who is most liked or accepted and try to imitate them. Soon enough I learned that I can do all the imitation in the world, but I will never be like them.

I spent my late teens and my earlier twenties comparing myself to who every resembled acceptance. I changed the way I dressed to fit in because trends are “cool” and if everyone is doing it then you need to do it too. When it came to my Christian walk, I tried to read the most talked about books, went to the most talked about event, and did or said the most acceptable and over used words within the Christian community.

Soon enough, I learned that comparing my relationship with God to other people’s relationship with God was destructive. I was doing a disservice to myself and to the Lord by comparing myself. For the longest time I wondered about how “suzie” worshipped and how I wished I could do that as well. I also wondered about how “Johhny” used big words, and I wanted to know all the big words in the dictionary so I can sound as articulate, smart, and “spiritual” as him.

But, (thank the Lord for But’s) I learned that the Lord doesn’t care what I wear, how I look when I worship, or the words I use when talking about him. If my words to describe the Lord is like a second grader, it is okay,  he loves it. He adores that I have spent time with him, know him, and that I am able to describe Him in my OWN personal way.

Galatians 6:4-5, MSG says to “Make a careful exploration of who you are.”
To sit down and self-reflect is one of the hardest things anyone can do. We do not want to get face to face with our flaws or short-comings. However, the Lord encourages us to do it because we explore ourselves and learn to know who we are. We are able to love ourselves and are able to be aware and recognize the Lord’s purpose for us.

The verse continues and says to also know the “work which we have been given, and then sink yourself into that.” How insane is it that the Lord first wants to shows us our identity and then wants to give us  work that is specific to each individual that brings them joy, passion, and excitement.

The verses finish by saying “Don’t compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life.” Aaaaahhh Whatt!!! Literally the Lord calls us out on 1) comparing ourselves, and 2) not taking responsibilities for the work that the Lord has called us into. I believe when the Lord shows us our identity, and gives us a purpose and we turn away from it, we are telling Him that it is not good enough!

Beloved be encouraged to focus on your own dreams, desires, and walk with the Lord. And if you do not know how that looks like, seek counsel, talk to the Lord, and let the Holy Spirit guide your steps.  The Lord encourages you to “Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else.” When we are focused on comparing ourselves to our friends or siblings. WE first miss out on our own personalized relationship with the Lord, and second, we continue to seek to be compared to other things in this world.

Ways to take steps towards not comparing yourself to anyone:

  1. Evaluate and see if you are comparing yourself to someone
  2. Ask yourself what is missing in your life that you are wanting what another person has.
  3. Ask for forgiveness for not embracing the Lord’s identity for you and his purpose for your life and for having envy.
  4. Explore yourself. Know what you like and don’t like.
  5. Learn to Love yourself, so that you are able to teach others around you how to love you.Happy exploring beloved.
    How beautiful and wonderful it is to know your identity

with Love and Grace,

10 thoughts on “5 Easy Steps To Not Let Comparison Steal Your Identity

  1. I’ve been comparing this article on how not to compare ourselves to others and comparing it against my own potential article on not comparing ourselves to others! 🙂 Thank you for sharing this encouraging message. It’s definitely a timely message and something that I know I definitely do almost as a default setting.


  2. Pingback: 5 Ways To Not Allow Jealousy to Destroy Your Friendship – Winnie Warner

  3. Stephanie Trish

    You are so incredible for writing this beautiful and inspiring message! I not only needed to read this I needed to read it today and not just today but right now! The Lord works in such amazing ways! I have many an issue but comparing myself to others is one of the top 5? I think it might be. I am VERY insecure, I do not know how to Love myself and I am still trying to figure out what it means to walk with Jesus and have a relationship with Him. I am still a “baby” or maybe at this point a “teenage” Christian.


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